The Importance of Risky Play in Childhood

Isn’t it hard to watch the little people you love most do things that make your stomach flip? Whether they’re climbing higher than you’d like, balancing on a fallen tree or attempting something completely new, every instinct in us wants to shout, “Be careful!”

And while saying be careful certainly isn’t the end of the world, it often doesn’t give children the information they actually need. More importantly, it can unintentionally signal that the world is dangerous, their bodies can’t be trusted or that you doubt their abilities.

Why Risky Play Matters

Childhood has changed dramatically over the last few decades. Children today spend more time indoors, have fewer opportunities for free play and face growing expectations academically and socially. At the same time, child mental-health concerns are on the rise, while access to nature and unstructured outdoor play has decreased.

Interestingly, regulations for outdoor access have increased more for farm animals than for children - chickens must spend a minimum amount of time outdoors, while the same expectation doesn’t exist for children. Yet we know nature, movement and challenge are essential for physical and emotional wellbeing.

That’s where risky play comes in.

Risky play doesn’t mean dangerous play. It means challenge. It means opportunities to test limits, make decisions, learn to listen to their bodies and develop confidence. When children take developmentally appropriate risks, they build resilience, problem-solving skills and a stronger sense of self.

And the truth is: children are usually much more capable than our parental worry lets us believe.

 When children take developmentally appropriate risks, they build resilience, problem-solving skills and a stronger sense of self.

Having Rules for Risky Play

Supportive boundaries can make risk-taking safer while still empowering independence. A few simple guidelines might include:

• Climb only on branches thicker than your arm.

• Climb only as high as you feel confident to come down.

• When lifting heavy logs, keep one end touching the ground.

• Use two points of contact when balancing.

• Check the ground underneath before jumping down.

These aren’t rules to limit play - just tools to help children assess and manage risk. It may be that your rules differ, you know your child best so adapt them as you see fit.

Instead of Saying “Be Careful…” Try This

If you want to guide without over-controlling, here are helpful alternatives:

• “What might happen if…?” Encourages thinking ahead.

• “What is your body telling you?” Helps them tune into their instincts.

• “I’m here if you need help.” Offers support without taking over.

Sometimes the most supportive thing we can do is pause before stepping in. That moment of watching, breathing and letting them try gives children the space to problem-solve and discover what they’re capable of. We’re still right there, offering support without taking over, but we’re allowing their confidence - not our worry - to lead.