Helping Children Get Back Into Routine (Without the January Meltdowns)
- Emma Christmas
- Jan 3
- 3 min read
January resets are hard. Honestly, they’re one of the hardest parts of my year. And once I became a parent to school-age children, that feeling was amplified tenfold.
When my children were little, we could ease back in. We could winter a bit. Slow mornings, softer days. Now it feels like one extreme to another - cosy Christmas bubble one minute, then bam… “Where’s your book bag?” “Hurry up!” “Why aren’t your shoes on?”
I hate it. They hate it. No one is having fun.
If that sounds familiar, you’re not failing. You’re just navigating a big transition. And this is where routines can make a real difference - not rigid schedules, but gentle, predictable rhythms that help children feel safe and steady again.
Why routines help children feel calmer
Children thrive on predictability, especially during busy times like mornings, bedtimes or getting back to school. A familiar routine helps because:
Predictability reduces anxiety
There are fewer power struggles or what I like to call, ‘friction points’
Children build independence and self-regulation
Emotional safety increases - they relax when they know what’s coming
Fewer transitions often mean fewer meltdowns
They build skills like time awareness, responsibility and confidence
Think about mornings. When the routine becomes a habit, everything flows more smoothly - for them and for us.
What routines are (and what they’re not)
Routines are flexible patterns, not strict schedules. They grow and change with your family. They’re there to support you, not box you in. They're also a really personal thing so it's important to create them based on what works best for your family.
How to set routines that actually work
Start small. Choose one routine to focus on - mornings, bedtime or after school. Expect to practise it as it’s unlikely that your child will do it once and be an expert overnight. Repetition, positivity and gentle reminders work best.
Anchor routines to what you already do. If your day ends with a story, add a few predictable steps before it. For example: After dinner → bath → pyjamas → teeth → story. Keeping this between 3-5 steps works best but this leads me to my final point:
Use visuals or cues. Children often do better when they can see what’s next. This is exactly why I created my Routine Reset Pack - simple, child-friendly visuals that take the pressure off constant reminding. It’s been a game-changer in our house, especially during those January transitions.
When children push back
Resistance often comes from tiredness, hunger or testing boundaries. Offering small choices can help:“Bath first or pyjamas first?” Consistency matters more than perfection and calm reminders go a long way.
And remember - it’s okay to tweak the routine if it’s not working. One family I worked with had a routine where once everyone was downstairs, no one went back up. The routine in our house looks very different to that so does that make one of us wrong? No. It's about creating a routine that works for your family, and you won't necessarily land on that straight away.
Routines are tools, not tests of good parenting. So if you take one thing from this post please let it be this - you don’t need perfect routines - just predictable ones.
You’re doing better than you think. And if a little structure helps everyone breathe easier, that’s a win 🤍
Hi, I’m Emma, Early Childhood Expert and founder of Everyday. My goal is simple: help parents understand their children better so every stage feels a little brighter. Because at the end of the day, it’s not about the extraordinary; it’s about the everyday.
If this post helped you out, I’d love to keep sharing more like it. Subscribe to stay in the loop!
Comments